How to Support a Loved One in Addictions Recovery

It is common for persons with a substance addiction to deny they have a problem and are reluctant to get the help they need.

A good support system of family and friends can help bring to their attention the concerns they have for their loved one, in attempts to stop the addiction from getting worse.

Some support systems may even include neighbours, co-workers, and clergy in some situations. In consultation with healthcare providers and support groups, this system could come together – or individually – to help the person with addiction become aware of their concerns regarding the negative health effects of their substance abuse.

At the same time, we can also encourage them to seek professional help.

What Loved Ones Can Do

Support a loved on in substance recovery

Alcoholics Anonymous help persons with addictions to overcome their shame and isolation.

Educate and inform yourself.

Knowing and understanding the effects of substance abuse goes a long way when trying to support someone in recovery.

Educate yourself, so that you can recognise commonly-observed behaviours and expressions, and be in a better position to help. Learn what to say, and what not to say. Learn that some of your behaviours may end up being enabling, even with the best of intentions.

At the same time, take care of yourself. Helping someone with a substance use disorder often comes with stress, worry, fears, and yes, anger. Keep yourself mentally healthy and strong so that you can help your loved ones.

Additionally, recognise when it is time for professional help. If your loved one is unwilling to engage in therapy, seek help for yourself from a trained professional. Get some tips and strategies on how you can be healthy for the rest of your family, while providing support to the one with addictions.

Listen without judgment.

Persons struggling with substance use will feel safer opening up to someone who is genuine, truly listening, non-discriminatory, especially if you also have experienced the same path.

Try to focus on their emotions and thoughts and respect their wishes and goals, even if they don’t line up with yours.

Additionally, avoid getting into conflict with them. Model loving and accepting behaviours, to encourage open communication.

Be patient.

Recovery is commonly a long journey. Oftentimes, people in recovery just want to be heard, and to be seen and accepted. They don’t want your advice, demands or instructions. They don’t want to be yelled at – would you? People want to be recognised for who they are, and be accepted as they are.

Spend time with them.

Offer to engage in an activity with them, for example, go for walks, for a coffee or watch a movie. Model healthy living, but most of all, show that you care and that they have your support.

Help them to help themselves.

Helping them to recognize their own problems and to take responsibility to get help is a huge step towards recovery. Forcing people rarely works. When they feel they are in charge and part of the process, the outcome will be much better.

Self-help groups.

Self-help groups are geared for persons who are trying to change their addiction habit but need to be supported by their peers. One of the oldest and most well-known self-help groups is Alcoholic Anonymous (AA).

Today, there are many other self-help groups for various addictions with different approaches. Group settings offer support from peers with similar issues. This helps individuals to overcome the isolation and shame of addictions and go a long way in complementing formal treatment and medication.

The Government of British Columbia offers a lot of help in addictions recovery. Additionally, there are many licensed recovery and treatment services in BC.